we made a giant pot of alcholic jello. i filled a gallon bag and brought it to dorms. desk guy gave me weird looks, he doesnt realize this is how i will pass all of my room searches
All I remember is drinking vodka out of tupperware.
he just spelled fiance, "pheancie". I dont think he's ready to get married.
Only your vagina holds the key to what happened last night.
Idk. I woke up marinating in beer on my beanbag. Idk what you mightve done.
Drunk in a canoe getting pulled by a lawnmower thinking of you
future-me showed up mid trip and gave us a thumbs up.
I told her my hands were paint brushes and her vagina was my canvas
Hooked up with a guy resembling a bearded Cher. I need the lenses on my beer goggles fixed. Pronto.
I think we need to stage a munchie intervention for Ben. I just watched him use a tortilla as a potholder to dump water out of his ramen.
It's okay that we broke up and all but it's not okay that he still has my Chick-fil-A calendar card. This month is free fries!
Wasted. And I have 5 pounds of potatoes that I'm responsible for.
do you think mom is upset that i left with the stripper from her bachelorette party last night?
I woke up and he already had a joint rolled waiting next to the bed. Love.
I'm so sorry for trying to eat your puzzle last night...
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