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ok, stay where you are, be there soon
I keep pulling short curlies out of my mouth. Not cool
Just so you know, I have a bf.
I guess as long as you bring single girls over and cook cannolis you will still be useful.
i stapled my math hw together with an ear ring, too ghetto?
Alone. In an inflatable pool. Drinking vodka and raspberry lemonade. I don't need approval as much as I need to know you love me still.
Just heard a guy on the phone saying " ya ill buy the eight ball " then came to my register to ask what asile the sugar substitute is on.
He literally just walked in some random persons house and walked right to they're pantry. Then five minutes later he walks out with pop-tarts, mac and cheese, and captain morgan. We need to chill with this kid more often.
I'm never telling my kids not to take ecstasy, never. Idk what my mom was thinking.
Oh yes there is. Now I'm the sad one. Please organize my life. And I will demoralize yours.
Don't be surprised if I hand out mini dildos on Halloween
When you're high, you dance like an injured velociraptor.
I think snapchat is trying to tell you something. It's saying your boobs were meant to be seen by his family.
Easy. Go to walmart, buy a bag of charcoal. everyone gets a present and it's cheap.
Seriously, he's as bad as Joffrey. I hope this ends like Game Of Thrones did.
Im drinking a CAN of bud light at the bar. Do you really think I care anymore?
Randomize