just fell over trying to sit on the toliet like a robot.
that coffee was exactly what I needed. Also whose awesome hat is on the couch with ear flaps? I wanna put my head in it
We are the drunkest people in Toys R' Us right now
I'm leaving my hospital band on when we go drinking tonight. I'm aiming for pity sex.
I have vodka an food stamps. At some point today, that will undoubtedly turn into jello shots.
Everytime I am with a guy I hope his penis is as big as yours. It never is. Thanks for setting that bar.
I'm glad they extended train service last night. People crying, screaming, throwing up, fighting and peeing themselves on a train made me feel like I've got my shit together.
Walking in on a gay threesome, with a girl in the corner watching and taking vid is a reason to not only knock, but to never go to Savannah.
She said, I've heard about you, from girls you wouldn't even be interested in. What?
All the drunken hookups over the last year are self destructing, at least something is keeping nursing school interesting
Nothing $200 worth of strippers and spicy fried chicken couldn't fix.
Pro tip: if you can avoid puking on your carpet, do so. Cleaning it up is absolutely no fun at all.
I thought he was foreign, but it turns out when you're that drunk, an Ohio accent just sounds Russian.
You kept flirting with some guy while I was throwing up on the sidewalk, and I screamed YOU DON'T LIKE MEN
Found this cake smashed up inside a box on the sidewalk. Im saying yes to adventure and eating some.
Taking a nap. Sidewalk cake kicked my ass. It had boston creme filling!
Randomize