I've had enough of this chick, she wanted to cuddle after giving me a handjob. I feel like I'm in junior high
I honestly get shocked all over again every time I pull his pants down. It's one of those feelings you never get tired of.
Because its an amazing idea and you're the only one I can think of that will allow a pirate threesome
I came home drunk to my night light on and a Hershey's bar on my bed. Mom knows me too well.
Could someone please explain the rug burn on the right side of my face and do I need a shot of penicillin?
i think dick pics are a sign of a sexual renaissance
There is a hole in her door about 2 inch in diameter. You may see me on YouPorn
I knew it would be a shit show so I just went ahead and took plan b before I even got there. How's that for responsible?
I just walked in on my lesbian roommate having sex in the kitchen, and it was awesome. We proceeded to shots naked together. Happy birthday to me.
did you see me getting spanked by that lady cop who was a guy?
Just did a "spirit of homecoming" bump off a stranger's credit card. A stranger that dropped us off at home. Erica's bad. How do allllll of the Eastern Europeans know how to find drugs so easily?!?
Classic dick move. Breaking up your buddies 3-some by coming into his room and doing the Harlem Shake.
My 7 yo sister is trying to talk my mom into buying her a strawberry margarita. Happy Cinco de Mayo.
How would your parents feel if we installed a sex swing?
Of course I fucked him. He's a professional beat boxer, his entire job is to do complicated shit with his tongue.
Randomize
