It was one of those "since we're naked anyway" type situations
I don't know, but I don't want you to think its ok to show up at my house at 4 am with a gorilla suit and a bucket of pinnapple and think id be ok with it
..and it was like all of a sudden I could hear the sounds my brain was making
whatever. as long as im no longer referred to as the girl who fucked the pledge on his big brother's couch.
The world isn't going to end because you slept with him!
... that would be easier though.
Just heard the words 'Pussy Riot' on NPR...I almost crashed my car.
He brought a TOOTHBRUSH and TOOTHPASTE with us on our date..... I want to go home and forget I ever decided to be nice and go on this date in the first place...... A TOOTHBRUSH!?!?!
Two shots of gin says this is gonna be a sloppy lab write up.
Drinking a bawls. If I'm dead when you get home, yes, they are poisoned.
as your best friend, I hope we never outgrow 'I Just Got Laid' texts
Well that was the first and last time I've had to write "divorce party" on a request time off form. I'm throwing it for my mom. What is my life turning into.
You mistakenly try to piss in a cactus bush ONE TIME and are forever dubbed cactus ass
Sincerely. Thanks. You could have thought of anyone sitting on your face but you chose me. :)
New drinking game get out your high school year book and take a shot for everyone in your class who's had a baby!
Laying in bed naked is fun. I now see why guys love boobs... They're sooo bouncy! This long distance relationship is really killing my sex life.
Randomize
