i nerd-gasmd. plain and simple.
In the car with my brother. His CD went from 2pac to Taylor Swift. I'm concerned. It wasn't a mistake, he knows all the words.
so im in the parking lot of taco bell eating a taco...and some girl just got out of a car and screamed at the top of her lungs "XANEX FOR SALE!!!!" i fucking love Hamilton.
girl! he was asleep with his back to me.he farted and i actually felt the wind blow across my leg.nice
ya i vaguely remember microwaving a whole package of bacon for 20 minutes or so and then eating it all around 4am
my roomate judo was messing around with a girl who recently had a kid, when he was sucking her tits milk came out lmao
she has a fucking refrigerator full of four loko and is charging 15 dollars a can.... she is like a mini donald trump
Oh yes there is. Now I'm the sad one. Please organize my life. And I will demoralize yours.
I just stole some rubbers from the girl I stayed with last night so I can use them on a different girl today..
No sorry. I may be a happy drunk but my gag reflux is an angry drunk.
Last night I had a sex dream about Trudeau, he hasn't even been prime minister for 24 hours
I woke up this morning cradling my vibrator like it was a baby
this vacation is helping with my sexual bucket list so much. threesome, deaf guy, and outdoor sex all accomplished.
Damn that sucks I haven't needed pants the whole time i've been here
All I remember is being in the middle of the road puking and my bestfriend cheering me on from the passenger seat...
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