I have this horrible feeling I'm going to blackout tonight & only be able to say 'wasabi bobby' over & over again.
Yea I just took my 1st pregnancy test. Turns out I am just fat. Also I haven't been with anyone in 3 months, which is clearly making me crazy.
he was chasing shots of soco with fistfuls of my birthday cake
Soooo, if his status went from married to single and he deleted all the pictures of his kids does that mean he's up for dibbs?
He pocket texted me while I was blowing him in the car...What are the odds?
Considering how often you blow him,high.
He has an intense fear that my cat will attack his balls while we're fucking
i understand you have values and thats awesome, all i want to help you do is forget about them breifly
yea last night was a repeat of newyears...exept this time it ivolved a fish costume, throw up, a hole in the roof, and cops...lots of cops
They're not that bad of drunks, they come back to the vehicle with more stuff than they went in with, so its a profitable venture.
Last night you told me you "were too high" and didn't deserve a hashbrown.
Being able to fart in my own house is like 90% of why I pay rent
I woke up while eating peanut butter from a jar. I don't think I should be social today.
He sent me nudes and I told him he reminded me of Buffalo Bill.
I feel like the dump I just dropped is the most successful thing I've done so far today.
Also I've accepted I am not going to be a catch today. I look like a dead hooker and the remedial work is going to be patchy at best with the shakes I've got.
Randomize
