is it bad that the economy has gotten so bad that finding cheap gas gives me the same excitement and joy as finding a hot, blonde haired, blue eyed, tall, athletic single straight guy?
Myspace is for pedophiles and tweakers in the 818 trying to hook up. I always forget theres music there too
Tonight must have been good, I have already had two cups of coffee but still couldn't figure out how to operate a door.
how does Santa get into Hogwarts?
my bf wants us to fuck our way into the new year.. how original..
apparently the dude across the street has been dead for like a month. now I feel bad about pissing on his lawn
I have no idea. I woke up naked on someones toilet locked in the bathroom with two baby kittens.
They thought we spoke German and French even though we just kept repeating "I give to you a cat" and "Are you drunk?"
It was huge And he was twirling it around. Im telling you, beautiful wonderpenis
HOW DID YOU END UP IN THE BATHROOM WITH A DANCER AFTER 12 MINUTES?
The liquor stores are closed! NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO! CURSE YOU SANDY!!!!
I'm 99% sure I just flashed my dad with my vagina. So that's the new low now.
He has a burner phone just to send dick pics. It's revolutionary
Hopefully they won't bring up last year's Christmas party. I kind of predicted my great aunt's death...
You look wasted in ALL of the pictures I just saw you in.
That can't be good for your liver!
Thanks for caring mom.
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