I just used Master P to describe what sound the letter U makes to my daughter...
Your dick is once again the conversation topic.
i took a field sobriety test yesterday. a crowd gathered, watched me pass it and applauded. then the cops arrested me because i took a bow and fell over.
so when I got there he was dressed as jesus in a recliner drinking whiskey out of the bottle watching spanish porn. Then kept shouting dont judge me or ill judge you. we didn't even go to a halloween party.
Is it wrong that im more embaressed about the karoke than the toplessness?
Woke to a half burnt 20 in my pocket, covered in mud, clothes all wet, so im assuming I didn't use that 20 you gave me for a taxi
congratulations to me i think I am on the road to legitimate alcoholism
cool. same. I'm in class drinking
NOT OKAY
sorry for partying
THATS NOT PARTYING THATS DRINKING IN CLASS
That place is a DUI and an STD waiting to happen. I think I'll pass.
I'm just gonna go have sex with whom ever is in the men's room.
You just get me....like our souls are boning in the spirit world
i just realized... if i ever hook up with someone on my bed, we'll be fucking atop my animated batman themed bedset.
I pulled you and a keg around in a wagon for like five hours and apparently everyone else remembers it but us.
Idk I've taught my 18 month old how to say nipple so kids aren't all bad
We just fucked in the park on a bench and a guy with a dog walked past us and the dog walked right up to us while the guy stared at his phone.
My cats name is now jello shot. How much do you love me right now?
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