I'm gunna smoke cigs today. I feel like I'm in that powerful and gritty mood which requires them
question - sack: should she or should she not play with it during foreplay?
No, I'm only going to drink half my paycheck. That's the responsible thing to do.
He came on my face and told me I looked like a gingerbread house.
This is a dangerous game of "whose life is more pathetic".
In hindsight, buying 4 different kinds of vibrators at once may have been a little overenthusiastic of me.
Made fish tank punch. It's like trash can punch but in a fish tank. Also, my dad saw a picture I uploaded on Facebook and called me a pussy for only making 10 gallons.
We aren't really supposed to respect our bodies til our mid twenties.
New found love of volunteering, when there's free wine available at all times. Good times. And I get to to feel good about helping people.
I woke up in a tow truck cuddling plan b. Can you pick me up?
I thought my holiday spirit was gone this year until I got banged to Christmas music. It's back.
I woke up naked with a duck on my head. I think something went horribly wrong.
Yeah I either headbutted a street sign while texting or I defended you two from an evil gang of nazi muggers. I was black out so I am gonna assume it was option b.
Just convinced the cute guy from class that I have prostate cancer. GET ME OUT OF THIS TOWN!
I need to bang the neighbor boy. He’s given three women screaming orgasms this week alone.
Also, my apartment walls are too thin
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