Just got my rental car in Iowa...gas is under 2 dollars in des moines...this is not a real state
I totally got off with my controler for my ps3. Soooo glad I ended up with that racing game for Christmas.
and I didnt even know his name until this morning when we were laying in bed and he referred to himself in the 3rd person.
After me and my boyfriend broke up I had to resist the temptation to send a mass text to my booty calls saying "thank you for your patience. it will be rewarded."
we've already established he's totally wasted. but now he's just sitting at his computer, doing i don't know what, and he keeps saying "dammmn girl" in a really low whisper
if you really think there are plastic pots safe for the stove i fear for your future landlords.
The bartender just told me he would have me face down in his pillow by the end of the night. I hate when you make me go to gay clubs.
I have a huge gash on my chin. Did I get it from A) a mini siezure; B) an oral sex incident; C) Slamming it into a ledge or; D) all of the above?
Yeah he's definitely gonna feel that one when he wakes up. I beat the shit out of him with that broom handle.
You're making her cookies in enchange for knitting lessons. You will die a virgin.
I bet it kind of sucks while you do community service I'm getting blown in the shower. haha
I think my vagina is phsycic. All day it tingled and then BAM Channing Tatums look alike fucks me like ive never been fucked in my life.
I just sat in the bathtub with the shower running so I could eat the whole box of mega stuffed Oreos. What am I doing with my life
i'm gonna crowd surf you onto his dick
You told me not to tell you found out you're pregnant..
Randomize
