Let's hustle tonight so we can relax tomorrow
Perfect. Like where your heads at
By relax I mean have sex
somehow, due in part to drug cocktail and alchl prior to meeting, i blacked out, got home, made total mess of kitchen, broke shower, and made 17 hard boiled eggs
Do u have any bacon or vodka by chance
his logic is that since hes already cheated on her w me its doesnt count
I want an alcoholic time machine so we could skip to new years eve
No, I don't think your idea of offering shots in exchange for bonus points to your history professor at B-Dubs was a good idea. Especially after you later told him that you would "tap that" in regards to his wife.
Just finished my quantum homework in ladies room writing with eyeliner. I am the party/physics champion.
Starting the weekend with a pair of pants on which the zipper wont stay up. Is this a sign of things to come??
yeah, I'm getting gagged by the cock of fate
Is it counter productive to ride on my exercise bike with a cocktail in hand?
This is why we can never be together. Well that and we r married to other ppl but that's very minor detail compared to the coffee issue
I got the beer and the first aid kit. You get the tequila and burn cream. We should be set for the camping trip.
I was grinding on my boss last night. So Monday will be fun. That's what's going on in my life right now.
Your penis is the destroyer of worlds.
I'm drunk and he's still weird.
Randomize
