return my video game
is it bad that while shopping i looked specifically for clothes that hold their form after taking them off and putting them on again and again?
after we finished he farted and said 'i've been holding that one in'
Remember when we were mad at her for brining her mom on spring break? She just won the wet t-shirt contest. I think we owe her an apology.
Only you could manage to look like a complete slut while wearing a turtle neck.
his dick got so hard in his pants and it broke his zipper
I didnt believe in cockblocking untill my roomate brought home that.
Do I need to take a photo of my sister's enlarged and disgustingly dark nipples to scare you into protection? DO I?
the cab driver said that we weren't the worst shit show he'd ever seen, CHALLENGE ACCEPTED!!
So, just in case you go to the bathroom in the middle of the night.. Sam is asleep in the first stall.
Intramural soccer game tonight. Be ready for blood. I haven't sobered up since thursday
If you can't drink with the big boys, give up your beer and go back to the playpen
He a gives rim jobs, because, of course a guy who opens doors and makes reservations would lick your anus..like a gentleman.
It's very disconcerting to wake up and she is gone. I never know where she could be. It's like playing wheres Waldo but Waldo could potentially be drunk and wandering around in weird places that normal Waldo's don't go.
Remember that Czech tennis player I brought home from beer pong and banged on your couch last year? He just booty calle me. From the Czech Republic.
Randomize
