Can we have unprotected sex soon?
Don't quote me on that, I'm a walking boner
dude that girl has seen more cock ends then weekends
I need you to promise me that the first one to find out our kids smoke weed, takes the weed so we can smoke it ourselves
i just saw her new tattoo, how much more trashy can you get than having "taste the rainbow" on your body for the rest of your life?
I went to go pee and found a strand of your hair wrapped around my penis.
I keep finding coffee grounds in my vagina
he yelled at me for calling the fat girl fat. if I can't call out fat girls to my brother who do i have?
You were crying because you hate wine coolers but you really wanted to prove you could finish it
THEY HAVE VIAGRA FLAVORED GELATO
her spring break bucket list included "break into The Swamp, blow him where Tebow has Tebowed"
So did you grab that log full of poison ivy for the fire and then apparently take a piss on Saturday night too or was that just me?
will we ever learn or are we destined for a life of poison ivy covered balls?
I look like I just got gang banged and I'm wearing a Taylor swift t shirt. It's not gonna be a pretty breakfast.
My roomate had an hour long melt down about her life choices not realizing I was in the middle of having sex... So yea it went pretty horribly.
She wants to have a threesome with Taylor Swift. I think this is the kind of love my grandparents spoke of.
Congratulations you now have a pet Scotsman.
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