hot mess party of 2 ur bar is now available
I want to take things slow emotionally, but fast physically
before smithy murders me i need you to know 3 things. 1) i got with smithy's little sister last night. 2) i will always love you like my own brother. 3) smithy's little sis digs anal.
She invited me to an Eagles game, I mean that is almost better then if she told me she could only function with large amounts of semen in her system at all times.
I'm gonna stay in bed all day and watch porn in an attempt to stay warm.
Ive been tazing him too get him immuned. He will be unstopable.
We met at my place after separate parties but the condom wrapper was red with hearts and said love. Does that count as a romantic date?
I think I'm on the verge of a really slutty period in my life
I called for backup and had two guys carry him to the shower. The bigger guy offered to wash his hair.
I dont have any paper so I'm writing class notes on my first response direction pregnancy paper. Judging eyes are all around.
Things were easy when he was just a penis. Now he's a penis with feelings.
I am going to paint butt plugs like little Christmas trees and give them as gifts.
You could paint cock rings as wreaths.
Sorry for peeing on you and your bed last night.
Nothing is more confusing than dreaming about being chased by jets, then waking up with an erection.
Ever try to swallow something and have it go up into your nose instead? Yeah, I just sneezed bacon.
Randomize
