Is it proper Ass-Fingering-Etiquette to tell her u felt her poop or just pretend it didn't happen?
I told her I had to go to work this morning, got fully dressed in a suit, walked her out, drove around the block, parked, and walked right back in my apt and went back to sleep..
Single schmingle. No one actually obeys the relationship boundaries these days. Its 2009.
They have edible shot glasses at target.
There really is a God.
she said her black crocs were her 'dress up crocs'
So I woke up today with someone's door knob in my pocket. I hope everbody else got out of the house ok.
My alcohol tolerance is way too high for this paycheck.
I've broken several federal laws in the name of sex.
Got a stripper to howl at my wolf shirt.
Nothing says happy gameday like waking up in only an ACC Championship shirt in the qb's bed with a different football player
When they send me to rehab, I'm screaming your name down the halls.
We're snowed in with only two condoms. This will literally be valentines day russian roullette.
Why do I have a wristband from the birthing center at the University of Maryland hospital....
Apparently mid making out I got up and said "I need to figure out my life" went in the bathroom and threw up for two hours.
Idk if I want to put a bra on
Randomize
