Yo, my girl thinks she's pregnant, so I've got a DD for the wedding. Sweet.
He wouldn't know what to do with his penis even if they made a "how to get a blowjob for dummies" guide
Just found a shot glass and plan b in my backpack...
Im guessing the shot glass is for plan c?
I think his parents are learning english from the phrases I shout during sex.
Went to anytime fitness at 3:34 am drunk after the the bar and getting whataburger. Lifted weights with my cheeseburger between my knees. That's called DEDICATION.
i turned my shower on this morning and passionfruit pulp came out. how did you even do that?
You are right. The scrape marks on her ass are from her breaking the doggy door by crawling through it.
Male strippers are involved. You are coming
We need to step up our tailgating...they're here drinking out of a prosthetic leg
You're about to makeout with my vagina, I don't think she cares that you haven't brushed your teeth. Just get over here!
No like he has curves. I remember thinking he had a nicer body than me
I'm way too hungover for life right now
So this is how i'm celebrating Easter? By eating chicken nuggets and masturbating all day. What a life.
Compositionally, that's actually a really nice picture.
And your penis looks really nice too.
Thank you for dog sitting, there is $60 on my desk to be spent on DRUGS AND/OR GAS ONLY not that food stuff people crave.
Randomize
