What do you want? Don't say anything that would make me look like a pussy at the store.
turns out the guy i was dating because he was a cop was not actually a cop. i learned this as he got arrested by real cops.
He corrected me on my grammar when I came. Fuck English majors.
i'll prob lay in bed. its weird not having to track my wallet down, its become such a weekly habit. i suddenly have so much free time
How do you say "get out of my apartment" in Spanish. No time to explain, just tell me.
I did, I'm just saying. Once the drinking starts my nipples are no longer my control.
Someone got day drunk, but I'm not saying who.
It was me.
ok so I've decided, new penis Thursday (formally known as new people Thursday) will need to be put on hold next week in preparation for Friday
Memorial weekend is the following week genius. New penis Thursday countdown has already begun.
Tomorrow, you will get a text, and it will bE spelled right, that's me yo, certify ya soon
I'm going to empty my bank account and roll around in the cash. Want to join?
More importantly this is sex weather and i am striking out
I didn't get a chance to take any pics but the mental snapshot of her boyfriend calling her directly after we finished was a really special moment I wish I could properly share with you.
I'm home, and it turns out she didn't get it all. still picking Oreos out of my pubes.
we've talked on the toilet we're linked now
That’s all I need in life: vibrators, butt plugs, strawberry lube, and sour gummies
Randomize
