How come ATM is perfectly acceptable, yet not washing your hands after you poo is socially reprehensible?
Whoever said drinking more helps a hangover didn't drink 96% of a fifth of whiskey last night. This is absurd.
I walked in and she was doing shots, betting the managers if any of the customers would notice, and screaming that nothing would ruin her Saturday night. Say what you want, I like working with my sister.
The story about him having a girlfriend changed real fast when he found out that I was a gymnast
I hope no one at work will be able to read the "who wants body shots" on my chest. I forgot about it.
You were running around drunk in a Toga chasing the frat's Husky. Of course they remember you.
This is why I can't have Wednesdays.... Or adult decisions.
Apparently you missed the drunkest me ever documented. I slept on the hardwood floor and left my pants on the porch to give u a frame of reference.
he congratulated me on my ability to grow long hair after pulling it to see if i had extensions
I wonder if you're allowed to smoke pot at Denver bronco games now...
Did we pole dance in front of my boss last night or was it just me?
I need five more minutes of sobbing.. AND THEN I will get back to studying
Because that's what you do with poop. You expect the worst.
And now I'm taking a break sitting on the bathroom floor thanking god that people who eat at subway are either too classy to piss on the floor, or are still relatively sober enough to not piss on the floor before 5pm.
We played 2 very competitive games of Jenga and then fucked our brains out... BEST. RELATIONSHIP. EVER.
Randomize
