i either bought an eighteen year old girl or i'm engaged to her... i'm not quite sure
She threw up all over when she was giving me dome. Not even gonna lie, it felt really good.
I love my penis, it thinks for me sometimes
you tried to pee on a squirrel and everyone saw. you've got some serious untagging to do
I'm sitting by myself in my bra eating a waffle and drinking pineapple rum. gamedaaaayyyyyyy
Gooodnight my beautiful sex angel. Much luvz for joo, etceteraz
i don't think they understood the house was collapsing. they kept dancing and jumping and asking for more cups.
After he finished going down on me he came up from under the covers, threw his hands into the air and shouted "take that lesbians!" and finished with "and we have dicks!"
I just tried to order ice cream on my bagel. I think I should just call it
Like I cant decide if he's like autistic or something or just seriously cock blocks himself on purpose with this shit
If i'm forever fucked up in this state of mind then I'm going to kill him for this
well smoking weed has become a deal breaker for me so I pretty much use "let's go smoke a blunt" as an icebreaker
Hey, it's not my fault that you had a shitty bed frame that couldn't handle the rough sex you're into.
We have an albino peacock in our apartment. It's beautiful.
Scratch it being beautiful, bitch just stole my McDonalds. Call animal control.
Just because I also want a blowjob doesn't mean I don't want to just see you too.
Randomize