you turned your livingroom into a bong?
I told him I was pregnant. Figured it would soften the blow of telling him I had herpes.
Did it?
Not as such, no.
Wedsnesdays are always enlightening. Tonights revealation: One should not smoke from something taller than their person.
The look your mother gives you when she sees you masterbating on web cam is unlike any I've seen before, but this is a case where, I would say, ignorance is bliss.
i've met an abundance of virgins and guys who where flip flops, i thinks there's a correlation
I made popcorn. Partly so the room doesn't smell like sex, and partly to apologize for the things you saw when you walked in...
Totally uneven. One tiny pussy lip that almost didn't exist and one giant lip that unfurled liked 5 different times half way down her leg and could have been used to hoist the mainsail on a pirate ship.
your life is going to be an empowering working mom montage tomorrow to Katy P's ROAR... --are you living in a yoplaít comercial?
Let's be honest dude, you almost cried when I gave you a handy, you are not ready for a relationship, I knew this.
Puking in the Ritz Carlton bathroom was actually kind of a nice experience
I'm just the girl with the breathalyzer keychain, and I embrace that.
YOLO is a great motto until you end up with Chlamydia
I'm like a saiyan, every time I get trashed I come back stronger
I almost just opened my door to get my pizza butt ass naked
Yeah I knew you'd like him. He's emotionally and physically self destructive.
We would have so much to talk about!
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