BLOW JOB GIRL IS IN WALMART
Some people actually refer to her as Kaitlyn you know.
the beat of "birthday sex" is shockingly similar to my dry heaving rhythm. it's making me nauseous all over again.
On ecstasy, in Ikea. this is incredible.
We had to put his head at the bottom of the driveway so the puke would run down. Now he's sleeping outside.
Scored tix to flower show. Do we want to go drunk on Saturday or hungover on Sunday? Only two options.
he broke up with her mid blow job, and somehow convinced her to finish. I want his life
Apparently you can legally be topless in Boulder, CO. Get on it.
um so slept at robs. he woke up, looked at me, and said ' oh my psychiatrists are gonna have a field day with this one' I think that's when you know you can't hang out with someone anymore
The last bar we left there was a sausage stand right outside and I apparently felt bad those guys were working that late, so I bought a $9 sausage, gave it to some drunk kid and said "I support local businesses!!" I'd say I've done my civic duty.
You get to be the grown up. Leave a ciabatta by his face.
Doing tequila shots with my ex to celebrate that we broke up... not awkward at all.
There are some things you can ever unsee. And walking in on your dad jerking off is one of those things.
Omphalophobia is a real thing. don't ever fucking touch my belly button again dude
woke up and somehow me leather belt got torn in half. either we partied with the hulk or some chick just could not wait to see my dick. probably the former tho
You brought string cheese to the strip club
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