I may or may not have just irish jigged at a bar. And broken out in a sweat from it. Not a good sign for that marathon yo.
I think my tv knows when im high and tells taco bell
Yes, I fucked her, no she wasn't that loose, yes she caused more drama than a 14 year old girl
dont you remember the bouncer yelling at you while you were trying to piss?
no. why was the bouncer in the bathroom?
he wasn't. neither were you.
The fact you even thought licking it would fix it boggles my mind
Well it worked
Not the point
What hospital were we in last night? Insurance needs to know
I told her she can't come to our bonfire because she throws up on herself & she has a mustache. And now apparently I'm a bitch or something.
the coastal evacuation route ends at my vagina so you can just skip the bullshit and come over
I'm in the room..It's full of lost souls and sadness. I can taste the salt of their tears. This final might take a few freshman today..
I could of sworn you were praying in the strip club.
She busted her face in a tragic twerking accident. Marking the 2nd time I have peed my pants laughing.
And I just want you to know I got myself into this mess. I gotta get myself out. Plus, don't you only need one kidney?
There's hope in those eyes, for a better tomorrow or more cocaine, we may never know, but there's hope.
if anyone asks you the platypus in my bathtub is a gift...thats all anyone needs to know
Step 1 was make out with him. so now we just need to come up with step 2.
Randomize