you can still come hang out if you want
I really don't feel like watching you play video games
Do you think red sox nation has an official powerpoint template/memo format for resignations of manny support, bandwagon applications, and other official business?
guess who just got paired up at the beer pong table with the fat girl who's nipples are hanging out...
i honestly don't know why someone didn't cut me off after i broke the ceiling lamp with MY HEAD
This guy just told me he wanted to bathe in bong water with me and then tried to lick my nipple through my bra. This could be love.
I NEED ANOTHER LEVEL OF CAPS TO EXPRESS TO YOU THE MAGNITUDE OF MY FADDEDNESS
Brian got his first ever blow job last night. We should make him a scrapbook.
He's in the same dorm as me. We are sharing a laundry room, gym, and cafeteria. I'VE ALREADY COMMITTED DORMCEST AND MOVE-IN DAY ISN'T UNTILL NEXT WEEK!!!!
He's in grad school at Harvard. I suppose that means my vagina is now smarter than I am.
you're the third guy in less than 24 hours she fucked. I'm glad you lost your virginity just don't act like you climbed Mt. Everest.
FUCK and YOU. times 10. To infinity and beyond. You bastard. Worst. Cockblock. Ever. I'm going to nail your sister.
That car ride home was pretty awkward. Your feeling up the girlfriend to the guy who's throwing up out the window. Thanks for that.
She's licking the vodka she spilled off the desk
Aaaaand now she's drinking it out of the shot glass like a cat
Yeah, but i got vodka and bacon out of it, so it's fine.
You're so sweet in the most vulgar ways
Randomize
