I would like to meet someone who actually lost their virginity in a candle filled room
FIrst one done
How did it go?
I dunno I taled about women being treated wrong and quoted Ice T. So probably a "c"
We argued about the championship during sex. Absolutely the manliest moment of my life.
today is monday, i feel like we should do something illegal
why did your cousin post "out tonight" on facebook? doesn't he know it's only 1 in the afternoon?
shhh don't tell him. it's cloudy out and none of his clocks work
You know, I had the money for a pregnancy test, but at the time, tacos were more important.
My last google search was 'bulk asian wives' I don't know either
Hundreds of bug bites..Dad jokingly says "looks like you passed out naked in the woods somewhere"
When I eventually hook up with a resident lets refer to it as taking a hands on approach to my job
Stop thinking your God dude. You passed out. God doesn't pass out...
How the fuck does a person bruise an armpit? I swear to god, I get the lamest drunk injuries.
And for today's main disappontment. I thought I saw a midget with fireworks get on the buss, alas it's a child with cleaning supplies
I'm a lady. Ladies do NOT hump the floor.
you told me you wanted to be a soccer mom with a high tolerance then you put the bottle to your face
we live vicariously through your huge boobs
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