smell like capt'n and strawberry champagne
i think i just saw hanson at the grocery store. one might have been a girl. hard to tell. lets call that one taylor.
Girl in front of me has spent the class alternating between playing farmville and the tiffany's website looking at engagement rings. Every once in a while she holds her hand up to the screen.
She doesn't deserve the breathe the same air that we do.
She just bought a cow and we've moved on to looking at wedding dresses.
How long can I microwave pasta with a 20 percent alcohol content?
we didnt even have break up sex...
you had it for us with someone else...
You thought last year was bad... a guy dressed as a clown showed up with cocaine
You're about to fuck a guy with a sweatshirt tied around his waist like a mensurating 13 year old. Get your priorities straight, you're graduating tomorrow.
I ended up at these random girls' house they are smoking weed out of a gun
I like how zombie Abe Lincoln and hooking up with a girl were on your same thought process.
I woke up sandwiched between them, all of us naked, and they were just sharing a cigarette, a donut, and the paper like it was just some normal post-threesome Sunday brunch.
He said he cried as he watched porn yesterday; I'd say he's taking the break-up pretty bad....
I spilled wine on my pillowcase and I figure it's basically my lifeblood so I'm just leaving it
Please come to class. I miss you and I have a horse mask
I hope I didn’t eat too many edibles just now. I got shit to do today. Like make Jell-O shots and take a shower.
Did anyone see us fucking last night on the giant turtle outside downtown Disney?
Randomize
