As it would turn out, "jesusssssss" is not the password to enter Faith Chapel's wifi network.
One reason I don't come to Portland. I saw 8 guys I have had sex with last night. At the same party.
By 8 I mean 9.
And by 9 I mean 10.
I swear if his heart was half the size of the cum stains he's left on my sheets we would have the perfect relationship
She paints her nails the color of the sheets of the last guy she slept with
he's got a countert top full of yard sale blenders so id say maragita wednesdays is a go.
So my date night ended with us watching porn with his roommate.
I just remembered our "im drunk enough to look at your vagina" conversation. Is that offer still valid? I really think I need a second opinion
We left at the same time. You got home three hours after I did and said you got your head stuck in a fence. I can't believe you don't remember this.
just walked into the study room and found an empty bottle of vodka and a passed out freshman. Did you have anything to do with this?
Either way, we will celebrate half Christmas the only way we can. Completely and irresponsibly wasted.
I told him finishing at the same time would be a long-term project. Like flipping a house. A sexual house.
I stared at him for a solid five minutes because he looked like what I imagine god would look like if god was a lumberjack
Stop your judging. I got free booze AND an oil change. You're the one whose always saying we're spending too much money.
I'm gonna cum garlic butter
Mom wants to know if you're coming over or if it's safe for her to take her bra off...
Randomize
