Journey is playing on the radio....I think it is a sign I am going to pass my drug test
I will show your tits more attention than Michael Jackson's death.
my phone cant type all the emotion im having
I don't know how God could bestow someone that emotionally confused with such an awesome penis.
one of the cashiers from Kroger is eating at my kitchen table and nobody knows why.
That's so unfortunate for him bc you can always find another penis, but he's stuck with it
She was kind of put off because I kept calling her baby my spirit animal and staring hungrily at her breasts.
Going out so taking the 2nd 1/2 of beer w/ me ont'tube in a Pringles tube. I give money to people on the street that have more self respect.
Please don't let me drink ever again. I apparently told him he could stay but as there was no room in the bed he'd have to lie on top of me and he'd need to anchor himself on with his penis so he didn't fall off.
To my wonderful winter break booty calls: thank you for making this holiday season enjoyable. I look forward to seeing you boys again this summer.
Were you rubbing your penis on me while I slept? I smell like penis.
I would agree. Whose business is it if I like to guzzle vodka by the liter on my of time? Answer: mine.
I think my body knows it's dying and is just shutting down
Anyway, all that to say that tiny penises are a hassle.
She gave me a boner for the first time in 9 years.
Randomize
