Apparently they want to see what I've been working on for the last three months. Can I just hand them a bunch of empty fifths?
i just got so high i needed a buddy system to the kitchen
The boys are giving me the exam answers and I don't even have to expose my body..yayy engineering!
there were more penises there than on chat roulette
Agreed. Everyone should experience a blackout before 3pm in their lifetime.
She stole my hamster. idk who she was, she just walked in and said she knew Keith so she stayed, drank 6 beers, and then stole Charles.
Yea it's a sex scar. But if anyone asks I tripped up carpeted stairs
You rode him down the last flight of stairs like a human sled.
On that note I give you a 10 for sticking the landing and staying on the whole ride.
Wait... All I had to do was ask for a sandwich and you would have come over
I'll be home next weekend. Its mothers day. Let's party just enough so we are frightened it might be our first
Do you find Darth Vader masks attractive?
Pray for me. I just had a sex dream about Debbie Wasserman-Schultz.
I've turned into a small time drug dealer, now who's the real MVP.
Wow this just keeps getting better, weed, shrooms, a stripper..........a gun.
He sent me a text saying his breakfast today was leftover mead and some fruit salad
Randomize
