ok please explain why some one shaved half of my pubes?
Dude they have ski ball. Anywhere that has skiball is bound to be bangin.
Pretty much knew it was gonna be awful when the extra condoms she had from her ex were entirely too big for my dick
He told me he wouldn't do any drunk sluts but me. I guess that's sort of a compliment...?
You should know that Team Beyonce's Vagina dominated in pong last night
you want a dog just so you can strap a barrel of hot chocolate around its neck?
Make sure you have everything youll need until sunday. aka a green shirt and condoms.
High moment. Almost just passed the blunt to the dog.
He's on the bus now and took off his Amish hat so just his long ginger beard is present. Goodbye, majestic Amish ginger. Go forth and represent your minority well.
I'm pretty sure my roommate is moving out because her cat likes me better
whenever i get involved w someone i'm gonna give you their number to testify to the fact that they should not fall in love with me
I think I'm so comfortable in my sexual relationship because he mostly wants to see me naked with large plates of bacon tastefully placed upon my body
Hammered...8am...why is there chickens in the living room?
They told him he could only pay in monopoly money and he pulls out a wad of it from his pocket... i think im in love
I thought I was drunk because I kept grabbing his arm instead of his dick
But then I realized it wasn’t his arm and that I was very lucky
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