and that's when the elephants and penises started dancing on the ceiling
oh but the power of the cock will take you to places you never been..i flew to hawaii once to sleep witha chick
about 90% sure I fell off a roof. It hurts BAD. Don't suppose you're still in town?
yup haha I infact DID fall off a roof. Want some bomb ass omlettes?
just mapquested my walk of shame from saturday..bye bye freshman 15
WHAT KIND OF DUMPSTER DOESNT HAVE PIZZA IN IT?
You installed a beer holder in the shower?! You're the best roommate ever!
... That's a shower caddy.
I believe this is a toe-mate-toe vs. toe-maut-toe situation.
At least now when I say "never again" the likelihood is that it won't actually happen again the next weekend...that my friend is called growth
You told her that she shouldn't be allowed to wear clothes then when her roommate asked if you like her you said "no I just want to insert things into her"
I stand by it.
Downloaded the Pocket Penguin app. There are now penguins living in my phone. Technology is wonderful.
He is so sweet! He thanks me for sending him dirty pix. I should keep him.
just pleasured myself to USA hockey beating Russia in the shoot out. god bless America.
I could drive to your house and kick you in the nuts right now....and not even stop for a burrito
No. I'm sorry but once your "would go gay for" list exceeds five people, you're bi. Get over it.
All I know is I woke up cuddling a jar of peanut butter....
Okay penises are actually pretty exciting. The people attached to them are an entirely different story
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