I figured he was gay when I walked in on him working out to Flirty Girl Fitness.
Now that the olympics are over we have no excuse for getting belligerently drunk for nationalism every night.
you grabbed his arm with one hand and the bottle of smirnoff with the other and headed off to your room you were on a mission
I already wrote the apology to my liver. He knows whats up
I have too much respect and admiration for my dick to put it into a situation where he could possibly be killed
The man who lives downstairs is fluent in Russian, and also a playboy. You should meet.
Me and him getting it in is for special occasions only. Like Christmas and when they bring the McRib back.
She cried the whole movie and got kicked out for saying "[Santa's beard] looks so soft I wanna stick my dick in it." We're going again next week. Drunk animation majors are the best
There is an alarming amount of urine in here.
I'm like still hungover from the quinceanera.
There can only be one screw up per family and I was here first. Get your shit together bro
He sent me nudes and I told him he reminded me of Buffalo Bill.
He literally lured me in the house with his cat then we ended up fucking on the living room couch while the cat just sat there and watched
His mom knocked on the door during morning sex because we were being too loud...now i have to meet her for the first time
Anything special planned for Valentines Day?
Does testing the strength of my coworker’s marriage count?
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