you dont need to remember merediths name haha. only jane
is it just me, or are high schoolers getting sexier?
you haven't felt a hangover until you wake up after a night of snorting tequila.
shes got that 'its my party i can do meth if i want to' mentality. i like that.
Dude this breakup has officially hit rock bottom. sitting around watching women's NCAA basketball instead of going out
The beers last night were like the tears from god
We're 17 hours into a 3 day weekend, and he's already shitfaced. He fell of the dock TWICE and insisted on wearing a life jacket on dry land.
Our relationship needs a sober moment
I'll call you when that happens
I assume you passed out however I'm drinking jäger and beer in bed with my cat so your friendship world have been appreciated
Who am I kidding? With my track record, I'm going to end up sleeping at the strip club with just nipple tassels on.
I'd call the fact I ended up in my own bed a huge success
I feel like hooking up with you on my floor, sneaking out my window and jumping a fence is an effort that deserves a happy birthday.
just spent the last 20 minutes cleaning out the soap dispenser. fuck. me. adderall.
i’n just gonna forge ahead, gag reflex be DAMNED.
Intelligence report: the hot sister called you gross, the sweet sister says you're dumb, and the smart sister says all the other men she knows would have to die for her to hook up with you.
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