and we just had intercourse last night so i'm exhausted, fucked up on adderol, emotionally broken and just pissed
that coffee was exactly what I needed. Also whose awesome hat is on the couch with ear flaps? I wanna put my head in it
I would also like to inform you that I can no longer lay on my back because my tailbone is bruised from the nightstand. Good job.
I've decided, even as much fun as it sounds, I don't care for his sodomy box.
thanks for celebrating my birthday so severely 2 years ago. i just found your hospital discharge papers in my closet.
anything for my little brother.
I have been sober for so long that I miss hangovers... what is happening to this summer?
just reminessing about the wedding and were they seriously to tight to serve a meal oorrrrrr was it just another one of my black-out-by-dinner drunks
the fact that you actualy have a 'black-out-by-dinner drunk' is a bit deserving..
Worst walk of shame everrr. Hopefully the thought of me walking 20 minutes in the freezing cold with someone else's sweatpants, a bra on & high heels will cheer you up today.
Oh god there are people jogging. Fuck off productive people, you don't know me.
Apparently it is frowned upon to ask the bouncer to stop pointing his flashlight in your face and step back so you can puke....and then do it
when the officer asked him if he had been drinking, he just goes, "yeah, you?" then falls onto the table.
is it too much for me to say that i have a ziplock bag with ice in it in my underwear?
Nana saw my nipple rings & made me watch Joel Osteen all morning
Sorry I've been a slutty nightmare this week
I'm sorry for chipping my tooth on your vagina last night :(
I got sriracha sauce on my mask while I was eating fast food, now wearing it makes me hungry
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