I realized that I've made out with a different boy almost every time we've gone to mcgoreys....I don't need a boyfriend...I have that bar
You should get sea herpes
I mean sea horses
I'm drinking reisling in a paper cup by myself in the garage.
I could tell by the Randy 'Machoman' Savage "hey brother" that you were beyond inebriated
i should teach a seminar on how to fall off the wagon
He ate me out on the kitchen floor while we waited for the cake to bake. How was your Valentines Day?
you were leaning up against the wall pulling your shirt up asking girls to dance on you. your courage to do that is both admirable and frightening.
The best revenge is living well. Or pooping in his sunroof. Either or
Deciding whether to take my sex toys home for Christmas will be the biggest decision I make this holiday season
jusy threw up in the airport bathroom. I am no longer thankful for fireball.
Basically I will actually need a reindeer pulled sleigh to make it to all the penises in one night.
I was thinking we could get together and exchange gifts, and by gifts I mean orgasms.
They were so sore! Either I have bed bugs or you were biting my nipples last night and don't lie to me.
Uhm... Found a ziploc bag... In the freezer. Sam, thought it was lemonade. Why did you make frozen piss at my house, again?
Dude no i feel my liver disintegrating
Randomize
