But honestly u used to be a cool guy and lately uve been superame(734): Superlame
and then he ordered a "diet and rum" like the most important part of the drink was the diet.
I don't know whether I should be pissed that there's glitter in my bed or proud that there's semen in there too.
i woke up with a shattered plate next to my head.
I just inadvertently flirted with my coworker's 20-year old son. I've known him since he was 14, yet suddenly he looked different.
You are nothing if not reliable.
She took a picture of me when she thought I was sleeping. I don't know whether to be amused or scared.
Jenny was looking for something soft to drink since it's only noon, she chose spiced rum. Think she might die today
He told me he wanted to show me something beautiful, then just started peeing off the bridge into oncoming traffic
No padding. I spent my whole summer with my nips out. October don't need that too.
after he went down on me he said he wanted an air freshener for his car scented like my vag. i cant even.
We have bigger issues at hand... Does anybody know someone in the kalamazoo area that is missing a pair of stilts ?
We hooked up in his car and afterwards he cried. I think I need to find a new hookup...
If you fall asleep, my vagina and I will never forgive you.
Can we smoke pot out of a menorah?
My ex's sister asked me to be her date to Thanksgiving. Should I go?
Threesome!
Randomize
