Come back if u want to. I'll do some dirty shit to u mamacita.
I just googled "whats above a trillion", thats how busy I am at work.
Just saw my neighbor passed out in his front yard, leg stretching into the road. Full beer in his hand.
Had sex with the ex last night. Regretting to begin in 5, 4, 3, 2, 1... WHYYYYYYYYYY!
This girl wants me to lick her pits
pits??
Yeah pits, I think I still go for it though
This is the LAST time i'm accepting the excuse "tequila made me do it". Even tequila thinks buying all of nickelback's itunes singles is fucking retarded
Well unless he sent his sperm via fedex, this baby isnt his
i dont know everytime i see her teeth i get erectile disfunction
I don't fucking care about the convenience of not having freudian slips. I spent 2009-2011 screwing around with 3 different Daniels. 2012 WILL be the dawn of a new day
How about a mike?
Already had two of those
Well then. It seems like we have a Mexican standoff of genitals
I made a Wendy's employee say fuck this and quit because I started flipping out due to a baked potato shortage. Of course I had a good night
I can already see the regret in her eyes. Amazing night. This city rules.
be warned: you might find a baby hampster in my bra
why do all the dudes in this porno look like billy ray cyrus
And then before we had sex he was quoting space jam to me
Randomize