So that's a yes to the cocaine usage and a no to the rollerblading
It's not weird mascara. I just have puke crusted on my eyelashes.
nothing like Chinese food and masturbating on a Saturday night
You're just mad at the fact that I want to be a car alarm.
Of course he wants me there for his birthday. If a girl offers you a blowjob for every year of your life, you're gonna want her to be there.
I woke up in nothing but a shower cap and your sparkling coke straw snorter thing inbetween my toes. Explain.
Thank god Shes going home for winter break, gives my dick a chance to recover from those "bjs." Youd think a senior could suck a dick by now.
my night ended with a pity blow in a racecar bed
I have fruit by the foot roll-ups. I wonder if a man could tie them together and make an editable bra....
SHUN THE NONBELIEVERS. THUS SAYS THE NIPPLE LORD
Just test drove the kilt for Justin's wedding. NEVER. WEARING. PANTS. AGAIN.
I just wanna be euthanized
Thas it
I hate to be the bearer of bad news, but yours is no longer the biggest penis I've seen. It is however, still the prettiest.
He looked so uninterested when the stripper was slapping him. Now his roommates are harassing me about how crazy our sex must be.
She really wants to hug you. With her vagina.
Randomize
