but, i was nude. you really should respect my stupidity and delete them. please.
Brandy, I need a picture of your boobs. Not time to explain.
Every day I regret the life decisions that led me to bank management and NOT being a coke addicted stripper. Every. Single. Day.
After skinny dipping in your pond, I think me and tequila have added a whole new dynamic to our relationship.
I'll give her a pass for the first one, but after the second threesome, she should have learned her lesson.
Who would we be if we didn't go out to drink during finals week? NOBODY
so do you, all the weight can't fall on me. I'll befriend a ball pit owner if you will befriend a drug dealer. teamwork.
uh, 3 redbulls and 400mg of caffeine pills and i still feel like life is in slowmotion..lets not take tranquilizers again.
Sitting in the library studying = googling how to get laid in the library.
Also, am I the only one who noticed he didn't fuck you until after you were technically a cripple? Or am I reading into this too much? Congrats on that btw
Yes he was puking but in the only light of the whole parking lot and he was resting in the patch of clovers and he just was a garden fairy
The whole movie was ruined when some chick started laughing with what you could tell was QUITE the mouthful. This of course made the guy laugh harder.
New drink: empty coke can vodka water maple syrup. Get on my level
my mom just told me I should hit it and quit apparently she does not like this new girl
You continued to run around saying "free the nipple" while "taste testing" every liquor on the premises.
Randomize
