ok i said sorry. what else do you want?
100 blowjobs
I hate when laundry day is determined by the number of cum stains on my bed
and when i screamed you came in my eye, i found out that everyone else in the room had only pretneded to be sleeping
Hookers taste better with whip cream
Maybe we ought to get some pennicillin too
Fair enough
Just dominated the men's bathroom at work. Sounded like the intro of a death metal song.
Im at the zoo right now high out of my mind and feel as if the animals are watching me and Im the one in a cage.
Green mimosas i think yes
You try staying up all night fucking a guy with a curved dick and see how much you want to go out after that.
Last comment. I know of no exercises, diets or practices out there to help keeping balls young and healthy. They simply succumb to gravity.
Partying with them is like having your dick stapled to your left nostril
I'm not going to be your wingman while you are in the hospital.
I take pride in being a married 31 year old who sleeps on her best friend's bathroom floor from time to time.
Just kidding. Don't worry, you're getting sugar and orgasms for Valentine's day.
This is like a walk of shame down memory lane.
looked it up online and zoo tickets are only 20 bucks and there's also a museum of science close to the hotel.
i'm not going to a FUCKING museum. i want to be wasted and possibly double penetrated... have you EVER been on vacation?
Randomize
