I would say the hottest chick there looked like Susan Boyle and the ugliest like Bea Arthur
Nice use of current day folklore
Life lesson: if you fart while talking to a girl outside, the smell does not dissipate, it just lingers around mocking you
I just caught my mom fingering herself in the bathroom...Im moving out.
so, i drunkenly called my religious roomie because i was lost and told her if she couldn't come find me, jesus would condemn her to hell for not leading me to the light .. too much?
i realized i had a pad on before i went to this guys house so i stuck it in his neighbors shrub.
I was gonna make fun of her but that plan kinda stopped once she put my dick in her mouth
I'm pretty sure I just overheard my boss call his sperm precious metal...
you wore rainboots all night because you said the forecast called for wine spillage
I took in his dog. My exboyfriend still calls me for 2 things, blow jobs and animal rescue. I need to end this cycle
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
No. Dude. I didn't knoe it eas floibg to move. It's slepprru ixuy!
Dude, I'm trippin balls. For real, I thought this bag on my floor was my dog for the longest time...
As planned I took it to the limit. Then we met a new limit. Now they are limit friends.
I just named someones junk. I should not be allowed to talk to people.
Do thigh high boots and a ball gag count as a costume?
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