If you're really into hairy Serbian chicks, Cleveland has a lot to offer(216): We're going to cougar night, the serbian chicks are the best aged.
At my boss' house at a bbq. Had a few beers. Taking a poop - there's no TP...this is my nightmare.
I just heard a teenager say to his friend "dats my baby! i was hittin her up on myspace like gurllll. she got me steamin". must have missed the memo its 2005 and we still use myspace.
Pick my eyebrow is burning. I'm sitting in the back of dolows vat and listening to jolly music and wilfgang is signing and looking food. Cute kid. Home is where I go now.
what. the. fuck.
Anderson Cooper interviews Obama. It's like CNN is teasing and broadcasting my dream 3 way.
My dog ate my bag of weed. Thats not the easiest call to the vet to make.
yeah...i noticed he pets people when he's drunk. It's odd.
We've done the math and the dogs tails are wagging at a rate of 3000 wags per hour. Stoned.
I'm hungover as fuck. My vagina hurts. I locked my keys in my car. It's about 93* outside. We're having sex in the pool when I get home
the best part of christmas was when my mom opened the handcuffs that were supposed to be for jen. Surprisingly, not the most awkward situation of the day.
I just googled "can they trace a vibrator back to you" so that' s how my life it going.
Their first impression of me was that I was completely naked. So yeah college hasn't even started yet and I'm already that person.
My potted cactus died. I am literally less nurturing than the desert.
i dont believe you. i want proof. if you end up at a hospital send me a pic.
He just compared fucking my vagina to a snow flake falling on his forehead: gentle.... I'm not sure if that's a compliment or not.
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