Yeah I'm pretty much like lane on gilmore girls except my mom doesn't look so mean all the time.
We fucked twice, I went to the bathroom to freshen up, and came back to him playing "Your Body is A Wonderland" on his guitar naked in my bed.
I feel like my vagina stays drunk longer than the rest of me. It's always super sensitive and hungry the day after drinking.
threw up in the library. i should be embarrassed, but i'm willing to bet that i'm one of the first so i'm kinda proud.
It's been two weeks and I still have carpet burns on my knees. Well done.
I will start puting down the plastic for the vom in our love chamber. If you want to be something or someone else for the night feel free. The theme is shit show.
I'm there.
Last time I sleep with a guy with a penchant to fragrance his dick. Every time I sit to pee, I get a whiff of Axe body spray.
Did I change midway through last night?
Seven times. The most notable outfits were UFC Fighter and Top Hat Viking
he fed me chocolate as I gave him a handjob. I felt like a princess.
They are fixing my bike for free, trying to smoke me out, and their kids keep hugging me.
I can't feel my clothes. I'm convinced I'm naked
If we tried baptizing you I feel the water would start boiling around you.
Current dream situation- Gordon Ramsey is my Uber driver and he's hauling around a backseat filled with chocolate covered açai berries. I'm good for eternity.
Knowing there are different types of spiders in different countries and regions makes me never want to travel.
Just calm down. My foot long super joint and I will be over shortly.
Randomize
