I wish my cat could text because i would tell him that everything will be ok. and i wish he could send them back..but him have no thumbs. him no know what he would text with.
remember what we learned. dont lure girls w/ food at the bar. u dont want those ones
at which point I apparently ran in and shouted "I made the sex with that one!"
i made potato chips in weed oil. what did you do today?
Sounds good. Stay safe. I'm kind of drunk in a Food 4 Less right now and I'm having the time of my life.
there is a dorito bag in my car full of my mouth blood
He needs a high five right to the fucking mouth. With a chair. Or an atomic bomb.
I think, at this point, getting pissed and declaring my love via reality TV would be an improvement
I'd be careful with that one, she got 86'd from the family dollar while SOBER.
I just traded 5 cigarettes for a sandwich on they greyhound.You owe me 5 cigarettes. I told you I would get hungry.
She's like the King Midas of sexual confusion. Everything she touches turns to gay.
Sex followed by chicken and waffles... Hands down my favorite morning plans. Count me in.
NO. FUCK YOU. I HOPE SOMEONE REPLACES YOUR LUBE WITH HOT SAUCE.
Congratulations! We have a period
i was in class looking for a pencil and found a chicken strip in my back pack. i think i might have a problem.. sad thing is i ate it
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