I have one thing to say: spongebath.
I wish that wasn't all you had to say. And by that, I mean I wish you hadn't said that at all.
did we hook up?
no, because you kept repeating "itty bitty titties" when i took off my shirt
I'm at an open mic night and the next act is called 'the best creed cover band ever.' The guy i recently hooked up with is on bass.
I lost of the blow last night. Found it later in my bag labeled Fairy Dust.
my secret santa just gave me a pregency test
so i just calculated it and i would need to score 150% on this final to pass
Sorry you called when I was puking in a cheetos bag
Learned my lesson. Pink pantydroppers out of a beer bong=deceiving
Sorry we're taking so long, this weed cake tastes amazing with Tabasco sauce on it.
i still can't believe we survived that barcrawl. the third bar had bullet holes and we still went in.
We're discussing which museums we should go to when we shroom. How ill would Picasso be?
Would be in best interest to sanitize the DVDs
Rome wasn't built in a day - my bedroom skills weren't obtained in some boring monogamous relationship. Same thing. Right?
Hey I’m obsessed with Charlie Heaton from stranger things...not because he got caught at the border with coke...okay that’s a lot of it
Panties = found
Randomize
