Dude, you need to talk to your mom
wtf?
She just called and asked if i would be part of the intervention she's planning for you
even through the webcam i could tell he was aiming for my face/hair
It was like if Side-show Bob had a vagina for a mouth
the bar told me i would have to take an hour break so they could wash the shot glasses
fun fact of the day: the man setting up my checking account at my bank has thrown up on my front lawn.
Just sucked a bong hit straight from my girlfriends mouth & pretended I was a Dementor. Life just 87% more like HP.
He took the Gold in Olympic clit licking last night. Canada should be proud.
That is an awkward looking cockshot, not gonna lie
All I know is that every time I looked at my glass it was full again and I thought it would be rude not to drink it
Lube filled water balloons always make for a good time
So how does one go about leaving their family vacation to hang out with someone they met on tinder
What did the sign say that bob stapled to his ass?
Your liver needs more exercise - we start training tonight.
I'm dancing with a sandwich I just made cause I'm so happy how delicious it tastes, that high haha
He ate me out for my sailor moon manga and I gave him a blowjob for his Devilman manga. Pretty sweet deal imo
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