I feel like our bond as friends is a lot stronger now that I've talked to you on the phone while having sex.
google image searching george stephanopoulos at 1 AM on a saturday night...once again
its like randi wears special contacts, but instead of colors they make her eyes say "I want cock"
it's ok. you also told me I can feel free to vomit on your blow dryer sometime.
Well I think it's fate. Considering march is my fave month because it's my birthday and st. Patrick's day. And his name is Patrick. I'm sleeping with him all through march. No question.
He may only be 25% black, but after that sexual experience I am 100% never going back.
... Cuz there's nothing like having your two male roommates catching you have a good cry in the driveway at 9am on a Wednesday.
DOUBLE NIPPLE PIERCINGS ARE HORRIFYING
I got to my internship late... with a bag of chipotle and sex hair.
I already left my house once this summer. Maybe we could do something in October.
Oh and it took quite a bit of doing, but I managed to wipe my butt with the hat you left in my car
Why does my nose taste spicy?
How do you know what your nose tastes like?
He showed up completely drunk with a 30 of PBR and ten cans of Spam. I like this kid.
We had a pink drink in honor of my underwear and apparently I made out with our bartender... a few times
If I told the doordash driver it's national nudity day, think he'd still report me for being topless at the door?
Randomize
