He tried. I said no. He said, "It's ok if I do this?" and proceeded to jerk himself off. Oh, the French.
$22.99 left in the bank til payday = 3($7 jack & coke) + 2($0.89 T-Bell taco) + $0.21 in case of emergency.
math is fun
You broke a window with your face. I don't think the landlord will be as impressed as we were.
Saturday at 4 is jello wrestling sponsored by the senior class council. That's why my school is awesome. Boom.
You don't understand. He was so ginger that he could make red hair a dominant gene. And I refuse to torture my future spawn like that.
when i saw his roomate the next night he kept openly referring to me as "the girl who orgasms loud" when he would try to get my attention
I used that money i stole from the stripper last night to pay for my date tonight.
I miss the "How many Grindr hits can I get while performing in an elementary school?" game.
I just replaced the poop spray with an air horn... Now we wait!
Well, personally I like to keep my blackmail in well organised folders.
WHO CARES HE GIVES YOU TOE CURLING ORGASMS AND SAYS YOU HAVE KISSABLE SKIN AND RUNWAY MODEL HAIR....WHILE INTOXICATED WITH HIS BEST FRIEND. AND THEN HE SENDS YOU CUTE SELFIES OF THEM!!!!!!! WTF MORE DO YOU WANT FROM LIFE!!! DIE HAPPY ALREADY LADY!!!
Sorry you uh had to see that last night. That's the problem with open fields, no privacy...
I have blood and BBQ sauce all over my shirt. I blame you for the blood.
At one point did I say I have a doctorate in fuck u?
I love random hookups in covid sex. Usually girls think me about a one and a half to a two and a half but now that I got this mask on I'm a Solid 6.
Randomize
