Prereq for being on nyc prep: money, bitchy, and a lazy eye... if only you were rich
i realized boys travel in groups of 3's and girls travel in 4's..thats why it gets so tricky
like hot dogs and buns.
We can't all go after the girl with the low self-esteem
It's just a condom. Most people would commend me for saying I was going to start using them, and you're acting like I'm going to try heroin.
Operation liquormelon is in full effect. We may die tonight.
So I just saw Jonah Hill at LAX and decided my fat fetish is back
You should go to counseling for that
thank you whoever used my nalgene as a flask. pregamin in chem
Quick question, when did I develop feelings, and how can I make them go away?
That's two questions.
Before he comes over remember the house standards. Ask yourself "will he stalk my sister or myself in the future?". If the answer is yes, then no, he isn't allowed.
Glad to know I rate above a cabbage on the parenting scale.
He was hammered and shot his pistol into the lawn. Next thing I know sheriffs are at our house with M4s. He likes to party
I was hooking up with this girl last night and she's on top of me with "Flux Pavilion - I can't stop" grinding in the background and I thought "Holy shit I'm going to do a lot of Molly this semester."
Did we really just set fireworks off in a cemetery? Or was that a dream?
I think so and I think we were sober.
I woke up in my neighbors backyard with glitter on my teeth and sparklers super glued on my bra. which part was your fault?
On my way home I saw a car that had "MOVE OVER PLZ" emblazoned across the windshield backwards, so people could see it in their rearview mirror
If I ever drive for Lyft or Uber I'm definitely gonna do that
Randomize
