ive never been so in love with another man before, in a totally none sexual way... no homo
a strip club that doesn't allow touching or asking for sex... whats the point?
unless her vagina can tell me my horoscope in sign language, I'm not going.
I found out he doesn't have a facebook, twitter, or myspace. So, I'm going to actually go to his house to spy on him.
I just jerked it so loud the neighbor banged on their floor. maybe my wife got the point
You get to witness red pubes. I'm almost jealous. That's like my dream.
He just reenacted his orgasm in front of my roommates....using a squeeze bottle of mayonnaise.
i was wearing footie pjs. how could there be confusion as to who i hooked up with, thats not something you forget
I was the last girl at the bar last night. It was like a battle royale between 10 guys.
I'm starting to think you fell asleep on your kitchen floor pantless with salsa spilt around you
I just got carded by a ten year old.
I taped a pair of scissors and a coupon for a waxing on the door. He gets to choose.
I found your missing hash cookies. Fuck you and I'm sorry but there are only 2 left. I already had the munchies.
Wait, there's no way I said I would suck his dick. I know drunk Katie.
No, you told him to suck YOUR dick.
See now that sounds like drunk Katie.
And with the bitter taste of failure in my mouth, i am off to pub to drown it in tequila and 19 year olds, so in the morning i can add pregnancy and stds to my list of problems.
I just had a man tell me he was going to think about me when he was fucking his wife tonight. This is my proudest moment as a gay.
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